Lessons on Hog Slaughtering

On Wednesday, I accompanied Savannah on a field trip to Old Baker Farm in Harpersville, home of The Pumpkin Patch. We picked cotton (free child labor -- brilliant!), took a hayride, picked pumpkins and petted farm animals. While we were checking out the 300-pound pot bellied pig, a grandmother of one of Savvi's classmates approached me. Here is a rough transcript of our conversation, and I swear I'm not making this up:

Grandmother: That one's too fat to run around the house.
WF: Yeah.
GM: That's what mee-maw used to do, run 'em around the house.
WF: Really?
GM: Yeah, she'd run 'em round and round the house, get their heart rate up before she slaughtered 'em so they'd bleed out real fast. I seen her do it a hundred times.
WF: That's interesting.
DM: Oh, yeah, she'd run 'em round and round the house, get they hearts beating, then she'd bash 'em over the head with with a shovel. Then she'd slit the throat, and they'd bleed out real fast, cause they're hearts are beating so fast. Then they'd tie a rope around the feet and pull it up over a limb with the tractor. That's where they'd start cleaning it.
WF: Hmm. (Walks away.)

No punchline needed.