Friday, May 19, 2006
Cooper's Mobile!
Well, last night Cooper put all the rolling together a couple of times. I was excited. Well, then this morning he decides he's going to do it all day. Boy he got himself in some pickles. Here's a bunch of pics to show off what my boy can do.
Friday, April 21, 2006
Fun with 2 kids
I hope everyone is doing well. We've been crazy busy. Wayne's been working out of the house at another facility. I've been taking care of the kids and attempting to take care of the house. It hasn't been going so well. We have such a specific routine that it's difficult when that is disrupted. For instance a typical day goes something like this: Wayne gets up with Cooper around 6:30, Savvi and I get up no later than 7:45, Wayne or I will get breakfast for Savvi. Cooper is usually back to sleep at this point, however, sometimes he's up and fussing, which makes for an interesting morning (sigh). While I'm getting Savvi ready (clothes, hair - sometimes this part is a battle of wills-, babies to snuggle with at school, etc.) Wayne cleans up the kitchen, makes her lunch for school, gets ready and takes her to school. While he's gone Cooper usually wakes up right as they are leaving and I get him dressed and fed. We work while she's a school and then I pick her up at 2:30. Then there's the afternoon decision of to nap or not to nap which I can usually tell on the ride home whether or not she needs one, but convincing her of that sometimes isn't easy. Then there's family time, playing with the kids, dinner, working out, bath time and bed - Wayne takes one and I take the other. Then a glass of wine and a TV show and bed for us.
Well, the past couple of weeks I've been doing most of this by myself, which means Cooper doesn't get fed when he's used to which makes for a fun ride home from her school. And going to get her usually times out when he's down for a nap or ready to eat. Then dinner has been hit or miss - if I plan it's easier, and I try to cook things that take as little time to prepare as possible. Then bed time has been the same except one night Wayne got home after they both were in the bed. She just went to bed a little later than usual. I totally respect single parents or parents that don't get much help from their spouses. Wow! I've been pretty tired at night.
Anyway, I have snapped some pretty cute pics over the past couple of weeks which includes Easter and just random shots around the house. Here are a few, I'll post more later. Enjoy!
Easter Pictures from Brewton!
What did I find?
Look Mom!
Look at that hair!
Enjoying a Biter Biscuit!
What a mess - straight up for a bath!
He cleans up well. His hair will stay brushed down for about 5 minutes.
What a smile!
What's he looking at?
Well, the past couple of weeks I've been doing most of this by myself, which means Cooper doesn't get fed when he's used to which makes for a fun ride home from her school. And going to get her usually times out when he's down for a nap or ready to eat. Then dinner has been hit or miss - if I plan it's easier, and I try to cook things that take as little time to prepare as possible. Then bed time has been the same except one night Wayne got home after they both were in the bed. She just went to bed a little later than usual. I totally respect single parents or parents that don't get much help from their spouses. Wow! I've been pretty tired at night.
Anyway, I have snapped some pretty cute pics over the past couple of weeks which includes Easter and just random shots around the house. Here are a few, I'll post more later. Enjoy!
Easter Pictures from Brewton!
What did I find?
Look Mom!
Look at that hair!
Enjoying a Biter Biscuit!
What a mess - straight up for a bath!
He cleans up well. His hair will stay brushed down for about 5 minutes.
What a smile!
What's he looking at?
Friday, April 14, 2006
[Stone Bridge: Spam Title Haiku] Spam Haiku A-Go-Go!
Thanks to the barrage of spam we've been receiving lately, we bring you mondo absurd haiku!
fremdem Zugriff gesichert.
Eine oyook new
accessory additive
competing against better
beholder behead
all, phave gdo cwood
--
Posted by Wayne to Stone Bridge: Spam Title Haiku at 4/14/2006 07:39:00 AM
fremdem Zugriff gesichert.
Eine oyook new
accessory additive
competing against better
beholder behead
all, phave gdo cwood
--
Posted by Wayne to Stone Bridge: Spam Title Haiku at 4/14/2006 07:39:00 AM
Sunday, April 02, 2006
[Stone Bridge: Fun] Documentary Under Way!
For those of you who haven't heard, Kelli and I are in the process of making a doc about the Body for LIFE challenge. We're still in the early stages, but you can keep up with the progress here.
The time I'm spending on working out, cooking meals, making the film and maintaining the website for the film will mean considerably fewer posts here for a while. We will, of course, update here with any new photos as they come about.
--
Posted by Wayne to Stone Bridge: Fun at 4/02/2006 07:24:00 AM
The time I'm spending on working out, cooking meals, making the film and maintaining the website for the film will mean considerably fewer posts here for a while. We will, of course, update here with any new photos as they come about.
--
Posted by Wayne to Stone Bridge: Fun at 4/02/2006 07:24:00 AM
Saturday, April 01, 2006
Spring has Arrived
This was a couple of weeks ago. We decided to forgo cleaning up the house and doing yard work and just have a picnic and have fun with the family. It was well worth it - we had lots of fun. Experiencing life sometimes is better than always living up to responsibilities. So enjoy the pics of our fun day together!
Cooper's first time in the swing. Do you think he's having fun?
Having fun outside.
Our old dog Bebes enjoying time with the family.
Saucer time outside. Now that's livin'!
Miss Hollywood!
Cooper's first time in the swing. Do you think he's having fun?
Having fun outside.
Our old dog Bebes enjoying time with the family.
Saucer time outside. Now that's livin'!
Miss Hollywood!
Saturday, March 25, 2006
[Stone Bridge: Fotos] Albino Alligator
It's been a pretty uneventful Spring Break around here. We're still trying to rustle up some work, and money's still tight. We've gone to the zoo a couple of times and had some picnics and generally just tried to have fun for free. Here are some pics:
--
Posted by Wayne to Stone Bridge: Fotos at 3/25/2006 07:23:00 AM
--
Posted by Wayne to Stone Bridge: Fotos at 3/25/2006 07:23:00 AM
Wednesday, March 22, 2006
[Stone Bridge: Spam Title Haiku] Mo Better Haiku
What is "qimpunity" anyway?
But brain qimpunity
Make disappear the we ight
Heya long time
Yet another brilliant ED medication spam:
"Is your dimension bringing you dishearened."
And this? Who knows?
" Fw: hmrpoiynn"
--
Posted by Wayne to Stone Bridge: Spam Title Haiku at 3/22/2006 11:10:00 AM
But brain qimpunity
Make disappear the we ight
Heya long time
Yet another brilliant ED medication spam:
"Is your dimension bringing you dishearened."
And this? Who knows?
" Fw: hmrpoiynn"
--
Posted by Wayne to Stone Bridge: Spam Title Haiku at 3/22/2006 11:10:00 AM
Tuesday, March 21, 2006
[Stone Bridge: Fustian] Some Say There's No Such Thing as Luck
I know as a Christian, I'm not supposed to believe in luck. I'm supposed to believe that we are broken people living in a broken world where God's laws still reign. Therefore, you make a stupid decision, chances are it will have negative results. If you're a generous person, you are rewarded, and so on.
What we define as luck can be described thusly: when someone who doesn't deserve good things to happen to them yet they happen anyway, we call it good luck. When someone who we feel deserves good things seems to only have bad things happen to them, we call it bad luck. And the way we define one's deservedness falls along these lines: we deserve good things, others don't.
Okay, we sometimes broaden those definitions to suit our own emotional needs. Those friends and family with whom we are closest deserve good things. Because they are the most likely to give us stuff. We also make exemptions for those who are so blatantly kind and good that we can't convince ourselves that we are better than them. Secretly, however, we resent them for ignoring the very obvious messages within our culture that teach us to be selfish. I mean, come on, don't these selfless do-gooders ever watch TV?
The ones that really get under my skin are the people who I genuinely like who seem to have an abundance of good luck. I have a friend who is good-looking, has a very pretty wife, a litter of pretty kids and is successful in business. Recently, he registered to win tickets to the Peach Bowl. He won. Then he went to the game and won a car! I couldn't win a broken leg in room of double amputees!
Basically, that's what this is about. I am bad luck. I lease an edit system that costs over 60 grand, and Apple announces software that will do the same thing for less than twenty only two months later. I use my house to take out an SBA loan and then start working so much that I have to move closer to my office. But I can't sell the house because of the loan! So I rent the house. Three years later, my tenants flood the basement, leave the house and don't tell us for two months. The result: a foreclosure because the mortgage company wouldn't allow us to defer the mortgage in order to make repairs.
This year has been a prime example. We get an unexpected check from our insurance coverage, and later that day we lose a job worth 12 times as much. We have a productive meeting about work, and within days Kelli's bluetooth headset dies, our iBook takes a nosedive and the computer we get to replace it is a lemon. So, that's it! I'm swearing off luck.
Say it with me: there's no such thing as luck. Luck does not exist. Doesn't that feel better? Don't you feel more liberated to live your life? I know I do. Bad things happen to me not because of random chance, but because I'm a selfish idiot. Yeah, I feel free. My problem is not bad luck, but the fact that I'm unlikable and I make terrible business and life decisions. Wow, that feels great. Now excuse me while I go see if I can have the good luck of tripping and falling into a noose.
--
Posted by Wayne to Stone Bridge: Fustian at 3/21/2006 03:23:00 PM
What we define as luck can be described thusly: when someone who doesn't deserve good things to happen to them yet they happen anyway, we call it good luck. When someone who we feel deserves good things seems to only have bad things happen to them, we call it bad luck. And the way we define one's deservedness falls along these lines: we deserve good things, others don't.
Okay, we sometimes broaden those definitions to suit our own emotional needs. Those friends and family with whom we are closest deserve good things. Because they are the most likely to give us stuff. We also make exemptions for those who are so blatantly kind and good that we can't convince ourselves that we are better than them. Secretly, however, we resent them for ignoring the very obvious messages within our culture that teach us to be selfish. I mean, come on, don't these selfless do-gooders ever watch TV?
The ones that really get under my skin are the people who I genuinely like who seem to have an abundance of good luck. I have a friend who is good-looking, has a very pretty wife, a litter of pretty kids and is successful in business. Recently, he registered to win tickets to the Peach Bowl. He won. Then he went to the game and won a car! I couldn't win a broken leg in room of double amputees!
Basically, that's what this is about. I am bad luck. I lease an edit system that costs over 60 grand, and Apple announces software that will do the same thing for less than twenty only two months later. I use my house to take out an SBA loan and then start working so much that I have to move closer to my office. But I can't sell the house because of the loan! So I rent the house. Three years later, my tenants flood the basement, leave the house and don't tell us for two months. The result: a foreclosure because the mortgage company wouldn't allow us to defer the mortgage in order to make repairs.
This year has been a prime example. We get an unexpected check from our insurance coverage, and later that day we lose a job worth 12 times as much. We have a productive meeting about work, and within days Kelli's bluetooth headset dies, our iBook takes a nosedive and the computer we get to replace it is a lemon. So, that's it! I'm swearing off luck.
Say it with me: there's no such thing as luck. Luck does not exist. Doesn't that feel better? Don't you feel more liberated to live your life? I know I do. Bad things happen to me not because of random chance, but because I'm a selfish idiot. Yeah, I feel free. My problem is not bad luck, but the fact that I'm unlikable and I make terrible business and life decisions. Wow, that feels great. Now excuse me while I go see if I can have the good luck of tripping and falling into a noose.
--
Posted by Wayne to Stone Bridge: Fustian at 3/21/2006 03:23:00 PM
Monday, March 20, 2006
[Stone Bridge: Fun] Hey, I have my own blog!
You know, it's been a bit of while since I did this blogging thing, but I promise, on the life of my iBook G4, that I will do a whole buttload of blogging this week. Of course, the iBook is already dead...
So, I'm typing this on my fancy new MacBook Pro, replete with Intel processor. There seems to be some kind of bug with the battery , which isn't charging. I read that a very few people are experiencing this problem. Of course, I had to be one. I'll call tech support tomorrow about that.
Otherwise, very cool computer! Backlit keyboard, widescreen, seemingly indestructible frame, very light, very thin and, ahem, very expensive. For those who've kept up with our life lately, you know that money has been tight. However, we really couldn't exist without a functioning laptop. Unfortunately, I had to do something I swore I would never do again -- use a credit card. Oh well, so much for my personal convictions...
Another very cool feature of the MacBook? Built-in iSight camera. I've been playing around with a little program called Photo Booth. I hope these are just effects in the program; otherwise, I've got to consider giving up my personal conviction against cosmetic surgery:
This one must be a product of the Disney-Pixar merger, because it looks like the bastard child of Steve Jobs and the baby alien in Chicken Little:
--
Posted by Wayne to Stone Bridge: Fun at 3/20/2006 08:49:00 PM
So, I'm typing this on my fancy new MacBook Pro, replete with Intel processor. There seems to be some kind of bug with the battery , which isn't charging. I read that a very few people are experiencing this problem. Of course, I had to be one. I'll call tech support tomorrow about that.
Otherwise, very cool computer! Backlit keyboard, widescreen, seemingly indestructible frame, very light, very thin and, ahem, very expensive. For those who've kept up with our life lately, you know that money has been tight. However, we really couldn't exist without a functioning laptop. Unfortunately, I had to do something I swore I would never do again -- use a credit card. Oh well, so much for my personal convictions...
Another very cool feature of the MacBook? Built-in iSight camera. I've been playing around with a little program called Photo Booth. I hope these are just effects in the program; otherwise, I've got to consider giving up my personal conviction against cosmetic surgery:
This one must be a product of the Disney-Pixar merger, because it looks like the bastard child of Steve Jobs and the baby alien in Chicken Little:
--
Posted by Wayne to Stone Bridge: Fun at 3/20/2006 08:49:00 PM
Friday, March 03, 2006
[Stone Bridge: Fotos] Mardi Gras!
Here are some pics from Mobile's Mardi Gras last weekend:
Savannah with Megan and Erin Greer at the Maids of Jubilee parade in Fairhope
Kelli with Ruth Greer
Savvi at MOJ
Savvi at Mobile's infamous Joe Cain Day
Kelli with her fat husband
The dude in the funky feathered hat is the latest incarnation of Joe Cain's Mardi Gras alter ego, Chief Slacabamarinico.
Kelli and Ruth in front of a fine establishment. I smell a new Girls Gone Wild title: Thirty-Something Moms Napping Somewhat Near Each Other.
Ben Greer and Kelli's fat husband share the love.
--
Posted by Wayne to Stone Bridge: Fotos at 3/03/2006 07:31:00 PM
Savannah with Megan and Erin Greer at the Maids of Jubilee parade in Fairhope
Kelli with Ruth Greer
Savvi at MOJ
Savvi at Mobile's infamous Joe Cain Day
Kelli with her fat husband
The dude in the funky feathered hat is the latest incarnation of Joe Cain's Mardi Gras alter ego, Chief Slacabamarinico.
Kelli and Ruth in front of a fine establishment. I smell a new Girls Gone Wild title: Thirty-Something Moms Napping Somewhat Near Each Other.
Ben Greer and Kelli's fat husband share the love.
--
Posted by Wayne to Stone Bridge: Fotos at 3/03/2006 07:31:00 PM
[Stone Bridge: Spam Title Haiku] Not a Haiku, but...
I love the title of this spam:
"chariot rolling off in his Duchess's consolatory arms? She is gone"
Here's the best part: it's an ad for discount Viagra! Brilliant!
--
Posted by Wayne to Stone Bridge: Spam Title Haiku at 3/03/2006 07:49:00 AM
"chariot rolling off in his Duchess's consolatory arms? She is gone"
Here's the best part: it's an ad for discount Viagra! Brilliant!
--
Posted by Wayne to Stone Bridge: Spam Title Haiku at 3/03/2006 07:49:00 AM
Monday, February 20, 2006
[Stone Bridge: Fustian] Nothing's Funny When You're Broke
Over the last few weeks, I've found myself staring at the computer every night, struggling to come up with something funny for this blog. After all, since the very beginning of this site, humor has been my stock-in-trade. But for some reason, this month I just can't bring the funny.
It could be because I've been doing a lot of writing every day -- rewriting our screenplay about the 1926 Rose Bowl. Maybe 6-10 hours of writing and research every day is my limit. However, the script is not really a comedy. It does contain comedic moments, but not enough to sap my funny glands.
It could be all of the time I've been spending in pre-pro on the Body-for-Life documentary. It is essentially a comedic documentary, or com-umentary, if you will. Somehow, brainstorming a few goofy ways to humiliate myself while I try to get in shape doesn't seem like real comedy writing.
So, that leads me to one conclusion: I'm not funny because we're broke. For some reason, whenever we have a child in the Franklin household, we stop working for months. We had plenty of work lined up for this winter and spring, but it was pulled back by a notorious tightwad who works as CFO for one of our clients. We're still waiting to see if that will come back. In the meantime, we're working on some new clients. It looks promising so far, but nothing happens quickly in this business.
So, for a while it seems, I will be struggling far beneath my comedic zenith. A few salient examples of how unfunny I currently am:
Set-up: Dick Cheney accidentally shoots a 78-year-old lawyer while hunting under the influence.
My reaction: Who cares? I can't even afford to get shot!
What my reaction(s) should be: Finally, a politician who's willing to take a stand on the overpopulated elderly lawyer population! OR: If it only took one beer to shoot a man, imagine the kegger the night before they declared an unjust war on Iraq! OR: Today, Veep Cheney declared he'll shoot one old man a day until the media get off his back about this Valerie Plame thing!
Set up: The Americans are in position for their first medal in 30 years in the Olympic sport of ice dancing .
My reaction: Who cares? I can't even afford to buy ice!
What my reaction(s) should have been: Ice dancing a sport? What's next? Ice magic? Ice poker? Or one I'll go to bat for: Ice mime!
Set-up: Bryant Gumbel says he won't watch the Winter Olympics, because of the "paucity of black athletes" and says that they shouldn't even be associated with the Summer Olympic Games.
My reaction: Who cares? I can't even afford to pay attention to the Olympics!
What my reaction(s) should have been: Bryant Gumbel? Wait, is that Greg Gumbel's brother? OR: It's about time a rich white man stood up for the rights of poor, black athletes. OR: Yes, I can see where such so-called sports as ice dancing and curling just don't have the athletic credentials of summer sports like badminton, synchronized swimming or speed walking.
--
Posted by Wayne to Stone Bridge: Fustian at 2/20/2006 03:33:00 PM
It could be because I've been doing a lot of writing every day -- rewriting our screenplay about the 1926 Rose Bowl. Maybe 6-10 hours of writing and research every day is my limit. However, the script is not really a comedy. It does contain comedic moments, but not enough to sap my funny glands.
It could be all of the time I've been spending in pre-pro on the Body-for-Life documentary. It is essentially a comedic documentary, or com-umentary, if you will. Somehow, brainstorming a few goofy ways to humiliate myself while I try to get in shape doesn't seem like real comedy writing.
So, that leads me to one conclusion: I'm not funny because we're broke. For some reason, whenever we have a child in the Franklin household, we stop working for months. We had plenty of work lined up for this winter and spring, but it was pulled back by a notorious tightwad who works as CFO for one of our clients. We're still waiting to see if that will come back. In the meantime, we're working on some new clients. It looks promising so far, but nothing happens quickly in this business.
So, for a while it seems, I will be struggling far beneath my comedic zenith. A few salient examples of how unfunny I currently am:
Set-up: Dick Cheney accidentally shoots a 78-year-old lawyer while hunting under the influence.
My reaction: Who cares? I can't even afford to get shot!
What my reaction(s) should be: Finally, a politician who's willing to take a stand on the overpopulated elderly lawyer population! OR: If it only took one beer to shoot a man, imagine the kegger the night before they declared an unjust war on Iraq! OR: Today, Veep Cheney declared he'll shoot one old man a day until the media get off his back about this Valerie Plame thing!
Set up: The Americans are in position for their first medal in 30 years in the Olympic sport of ice dancing .
My reaction: Who cares? I can't even afford to buy ice!
What my reaction(s) should have been: Ice dancing a sport? What's next? Ice magic? Ice poker? Or one I'll go to bat for: Ice mime!
Set-up: Bryant Gumbel says he won't watch the Winter Olympics, because of the "paucity of black athletes" and says that they shouldn't even be associated with the Summer Olympic Games.
My reaction: Who cares? I can't even afford to pay attention to the Olympics!
What my reaction(s) should have been: Bryant Gumbel? Wait, is that Greg Gumbel's brother? OR: It's about time a rich white man stood up for the rights of poor, black athletes. OR: Yes, I can see where such so-called sports as ice dancing and curling just don't have the athletic credentials of summer sports like badminton, synchronized swimming or speed walking.
--
Posted by Wayne to Stone Bridge: Fustian at 2/20/2006 03:33:00 PM
Friday, February 17, 2006
[Stone Bridge: Spam Title Haiku] All from one little e-mail...
The following haiku was taken from a single subject line:
it captivate be corduroy
it blurb try emblematic
be pushout
--
Posted by Wayne to Stone Bridge: Spam Title Haiku at 2/17/2006 03:46:00 PM
it captivate be corduroy
it blurb try emblematic
be pushout
--
Posted by Wayne to Stone Bridge: Spam Title Haiku at 2/17/2006 03:46:00 PM
[Stone Bridge: Spam Title Haiku] Huh?
Forget nonsensical phrases and clauses. Forget misspellings. Full-on nonsense is the Spam Title Haiku trend of the day!
howz going
br0ke 0ut 0f its base
eat be asleep
Re: ve nder news
sfind por gdays
Re: tr apes news
--
Posted by Wayne to Stone Bridge: Spam Title Haiku at 2/17/2006 07:48:00 AM
howz going
br0ke 0ut 0f its base
eat be asleep
Re: ve nder news
sfind por gdays
Re: tr apes news
--
Posted by Wayne to Stone Bridge: Spam Title Haiku at 2/17/2006 07:48:00 AM
Saturday, February 11, 2006
[Stone Bridge: Family] Coop Rolls Over -- Film at 11!
Cooper rolled over for the first time yesterday, just one week short of being four months old. I thought he was behind the curve, but Kelli checked Savvi's baby book, and she rolled over only two days earlier. (Not two days earlier this week, but two days earlier in age.) If you go with that whole gestational age equation, then he technically rolled over 17 days sooner. But that's just a pain to calculate. (Besides, if we go with gestational ages, then I'm already 36, and I'm in no hurry to get there.)
I barely got the camcorder rolling in time to capture it. I'll post video of that and of him laughing later this weekend.
Also, I'm trying to catch some video of him doing a few pretty amazing things. Kelli was in his face talking to him and he grabbed her nose. She told him what the nose was a few times. Then she asked him if he could grab her nose. He did, several times in fact. Our child is a genius! Take that, all you parents of average children! Not that I am prone to pride...
But I have a policy of setting the bar low for my children, so I won't be disappointed. In keeping with that policy, I thought that maybe he was grabbing her nose because it's the most prominent facial feature. Then he grabbed her chin one of the times when she said "nose." Ah ha! I was right! It was just a fluke! He's no genius. He's just an average idiot like all of your children. Then, to my amazement, he slowly slid his hand up to get to her nose. Okay that was a little freaky.
I decided to test it further the next day. I sat with him and pointed three or four times to my chin, touching his hand to it repeating the word "chin." I then touched his chin about four times, again repeating the word. Next, I asked him to grab my chin. He did. Not too much of a surprise. Now the real test: I told him to grab my nose. He did it! Several times over, he correctly grabbed whichever of the two facial features I said. He NEVER grabbed the wrong one.
I've since repeated the test on a couple of different days. One day, he was simply not interested and just stared at me with indifference. The other times, he repeated the results of my first test. I think this kid is freaky smart. Don't worry, we'll find a way to screw him up.
Something else I need to get on video is him "talking." For more than a month now, he has been making a sound whenever he's hungry that varies between "uhng-gee" and "hun-gee." Sometimes, there's even an "r" sound in there. At first, we thought it was just a coincidence. Then we noticed that if we said the word "hungry" to him, but didn't immediately feed him, he would get really angry.
Now, he doesn't say it every day, but probably five days out of the week he says it 10-12 times per day. And ONLY when he is actually hungry. Also, whenever he whines for a while, but doesn't get our attention, he'll resort to yelling, at the top of his lungs, "HEY!" He sometimes makes a sound that is like "da" or "da-dee." We don't really think he associates this with me or me and Kel collectively. We think it's just a sound he makes, but who knows? The most amazing thing about that is that he can make the "d" sound so early. (He started doing it at about 12 weeks.)
Now, I know some of you think we're completely out of our minds. I've always thought that my mom was crazy for saying that I spoke at 3 months. She was very sick at the time, taking lost of medication. You could see where she might get confused. We hesitated for weeks to tell anyone this, but we are so certain that he is actually speaking, that we had to share it. Judge us if you must. We'll just exploit our freakishly smart baby, use our ill-gotten fortune to buy your employer and fire your ass!
--
Posted by Wayne to Stone Bridge: Family at 2/11/2006 09:56:00 AM
I barely got the camcorder rolling in time to capture it. I'll post video of that and of him laughing later this weekend.
Also, I'm trying to catch some video of him doing a few pretty amazing things. Kelli was in his face talking to him and he grabbed her nose. She told him what the nose was a few times. Then she asked him if he could grab her nose. He did, several times in fact. Our child is a genius! Take that, all you parents of average children! Not that I am prone to pride...
But I have a policy of setting the bar low for my children, so I won't be disappointed. In keeping with that policy, I thought that maybe he was grabbing her nose because it's the most prominent facial feature. Then he grabbed her chin one of the times when she said "nose." Ah ha! I was right! It was just a fluke! He's no genius. He's just an average idiot like all of your children. Then, to my amazement, he slowly slid his hand up to get to her nose. Okay that was a little freaky.
I decided to test it further the next day. I sat with him and pointed three or four times to my chin, touching his hand to it repeating the word "chin." I then touched his chin about four times, again repeating the word. Next, I asked him to grab my chin. He did. Not too much of a surprise. Now the real test: I told him to grab my nose. He did it! Several times over, he correctly grabbed whichever of the two facial features I said. He NEVER grabbed the wrong one.
I've since repeated the test on a couple of different days. One day, he was simply not interested and just stared at me with indifference. The other times, he repeated the results of my first test. I think this kid is freaky smart. Don't worry, we'll find a way to screw him up.
Something else I need to get on video is him "talking." For more than a month now, he has been making a sound whenever he's hungry that varies between "uhng-gee" and "hun-gee." Sometimes, there's even an "r" sound in there. At first, we thought it was just a coincidence. Then we noticed that if we said the word "hungry" to him, but didn't immediately feed him, he would get really angry.
Now, he doesn't say it every day, but probably five days out of the week he says it 10-12 times per day. And ONLY when he is actually hungry. Also, whenever he whines for a while, but doesn't get our attention, he'll resort to yelling, at the top of his lungs, "HEY!" He sometimes makes a sound that is like "da" or "da-dee." We don't really think he associates this with me or me and Kel collectively. We think it's just a sound he makes, but who knows? The most amazing thing about that is that he can make the "d" sound so early. (He started doing it at about 12 weeks.)
Now, I know some of you think we're completely out of our minds. I've always thought that my mom was crazy for saying that I spoke at 3 months. She was very sick at the time, taking lost of medication. You could see where she might get confused. We hesitated for weeks to tell anyone this, but we are so certain that he is actually speaking, that we had to share it. Judge us if you must. We'll just exploit our freakishly smart baby, use our ill-gotten fortune to buy your employer and fire your ass!
--
Posted by Wayne to Stone Bridge: Family at 2/11/2006 09:56:00 AM
[Stone Bridge: Family] Sorry for the Distinct Lack of Bloggage
We've been busy prepping the documentary shoot and doing major rewrites on a script, so time to blog has been hard to come by. Kelli has been in fairly severe pain for more than two weeks now in her hip. I've been spending my evening trying to massage her or playing with her hair to distract her from the pain. (Don't ask me why it works, but it's our cure-all for Kel's ailments.)
A couple of years ago, one orthopedic diagnosed it as degenerative disc disease. He ordered her a cortisone injection to relieve the inflammation. The doc performing the procedure told Kelli it wasn't DDD, but arthritis. Osteoarthritis requires wear and tear to the hip joint, which was not indicated by X-ray or MRI. She went to a rheumatologist to see about medication to manage the inflammation, but he told her that her blood work revealed no rheumatoid arthritis. So the moral is, you can totally screw up at your job and still make a quarter million bucks a year.
We're trying to get Kelli in at a different practice, Alabama Sports Medicine. If you're from the 'Ham or have ever followed sports at all, you know that these guys have a client roster that reads like a Who's Who of college and professional athletes. We figure if the pros are trusting Doc Andrews and company with their multi-million dollar salaries, then they must be pretty good.
Of course, in the era of the internet, everyone's a quack. We did some searches on Kelli's symptoms, and we found a few conditions that at least partially matched. Trochanteric bursitis has many similar pain symptoms, but is exacerbated by movement. Kelli's pain, on the other hand, is relieved by moderate walking and worse when she sits or lies down for too long. While spinal stenosis could result from Kelli's scoliosis, its symptoms tend to be more in the legs and include weakness and numbness, neither of which she is experiencing. The somewhat controversial condition known as piriformis syndrome doesn't fit the bill because it doesn't include lower back pain, which always accompanies the pain in Kelli's hip.
We then stumbled upon a condition called sacroilitis, which can be caused by child bearing. (Kelli's pain onset following her pregnancy with Savannah.)Here's a brief description of the symptoms:
This condition was widely popular as a diagnosis early in the 20th century. When herniated, slipped and degenerated discs became popularized in the mid-20th century, sacroilitis fell out of favor and is rarely given as a diagnosis today. Who knew the fickle winds of fashion blew through modern medicine? Hopefully, Kelli will get in to see a new orthopedic soon, tell him/her the sacroilitis theory and get some treatment.
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Posted by Wayne to Stone Bridge: Family at 2/11/2006 07:56:00 AM
A couple of years ago, one orthopedic diagnosed it as degenerative disc disease. He ordered her a cortisone injection to relieve the inflammation. The doc performing the procedure told Kelli it wasn't DDD, but arthritis. Osteoarthritis requires wear and tear to the hip joint, which was not indicated by X-ray or MRI. She went to a rheumatologist to see about medication to manage the inflammation, but he told her that her blood work revealed no rheumatoid arthritis. So the moral is, you can totally screw up at your job and still make a quarter million bucks a year.
We're trying to get Kelli in at a different practice, Alabama Sports Medicine. If you're from the 'Ham or have ever followed sports at all, you know that these guys have a client roster that reads like a Who's Who of college and professional athletes. We figure if the pros are trusting Doc Andrews and company with their multi-million dollar salaries, then they must be pretty good.
Of course, in the era of the internet, everyone's a quack. We did some searches on Kelli's symptoms, and we found a few conditions that at least partially matched. Trochanteric bursitis has many similar pain symptoms, but is exacerbated by movement. Kelli's pain, on the other hand, is relieved by moderate walking and worse when she sits or lies down for too long. While spinal stenosis could result from Kelli's scoliosis, its symptoms tend to be more in the legs and include weakness and numbness, neither of which she is experiencing. The somewhat controversial condition known as piriformis syndrome doesn't fit the bill because it doesn't include lower back pain, which always accompanies the pain in Kelli's hip.
We then stumbled upon a condition called sacroilitis, which can be caused by child bearing. (Kelli's pain onset following her pregnancy with Savannah.)Here's a brief description of the symptoms:
Patients with SI inflammation will generally complain of low back, buttock, and thigh pain. This pain typically becomes worse when sitting for any prolonged period of time. Sacroiliitis is commonly confused with sciatica.
This condition was widely popular as a diagnosis early in the 20th century. When herniated, slipped and degenerated discs became popularized in the mid-20th century, sacroilitis fell out of favor and is rarely given as a diagnosis today. Who knew the fickle winds of fashion blew through modern medicine? Hopefully, Kelli will get in to see a new orthopedic soon, tell him/her the sacroilitis theory and get some treatment.
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Posted by Wayne to Stone Bridge: Family at 2/11/2006 07:56:00 AM
Tuesday, January 31, 2006
[Stone Bridge: Film] Miyazaki's Oscar Nom
Following up on my Miyazaki post from last night, the unveiling of this year's Oscar nominations shows Miyazaki's Howl's Moving Castle nominated in the Best Animated Feature category. THe other nominees are Corpse Bride and Wallace & Gromit in The Curse of the Were-Rabbit.
Interesting to note is that none of the nominated films autilize 3D computer animation. Howl's is traditional 2d cel animation, Corpse is stop-motion and Wallace & Gromit come to life via claymation. I know Aardman used some computer animation to augment their iconic cheese-loving clay characters. (In fact, the studio's next picture is entirely CGI, but made to capture the Plasticine look of their previous films.) I read that Miyazaki will allow some CGI in his films, but it cannot make up more than 10% of the total screen time. Burton used off-the-shelf digital still cameras to shoot the frames for his film. So there may have been some
digital technology employed in each of these, but none of them were created entirely on the computer.
This is interesting because a few years ago, Disney famously put all their animation eggs in the CGI basket. The result? Chicken Little. Enough said. I read at the time that Disney Animation sold all of their cel animation stands. When they got out of the 2D business, they were out for good. The Disney execs believed that what made Shrek and the Pixar films popular at the box office was the technology. That's what you get for letting paper-pushers make creative decisions.
But maybe Disney didn't get out of the 2D biz after all. When they sold those animation stands, they were snapped up by a little company in Northern California... called Pixar. Hopefully the animation stands won't be the only traditions coming home to Disney. Maybe the idea of telling good stories will return as well.
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Posted by Wayne to Stone Bridge: Film at 1/31/2006 11:11:00 AM
Interesting to note is that none of the nominated films autilize 3D computer animation. Howl's is traditional 2d cel animation, Corpse is stop-motion and Wallace & Gromit come to life via claymation. I know Aardman used some computer animation to augment their iconic cheese-loving clay characters. (In fact, the studio's next picture is entirely CGI, but made to capture the Plasticine look of their previous films.) I read that Miyazaki will allow some CGI in his films, but it cannot make up more than 10% of the total screen time. Burton used off-the-shelf digital still cameras to shoot the frames for his film. So there may have been some
digital technology employed in each of these, but none of them were created entirely on the computer.
This is interesting because a few years ago, Disney famously put all their animation eggs in the CGI basket. The result? Chicken Little. Enough said. I read at the time that Disney Animation sold all of their cel animation stands. When they got out of the 2D business, they were out for good. The Disney execs believed that what made Shrek and the Pixar films popular at the box office was the technology. That's what you get for letting paper-pushers make creative decisions.
But maybe Disney didn't get out of the 2D biz after all. When they sold those animation stands, they were snapped up by a little company in Northern California... called Pixar. Hopefully the animation stands won't be the only traditions coming home to Disney. Maybe the idea of telling good stories will return as well.
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Posted by Wayne to Stone Bridge: Film at 1/31/2006 11:11:00 AM
Monday, January 30, 2006
[Stone Bridge: Film] Why the Japanese Make All the Cool Stuff
Leave it to the ever restless minds of the Japanese culture, in their unending quest for perfection, to invent a better way to fold a shirt.
In all seriousness, I've been really getting into the films of Japanese animation genius Hayao Miyazaki. Turner Classic Movies has been playing his films every Thursday night this week. Savannah and I absolutely fell in love with "Nausicaa of the Valley of the Wind" and "My Neighbor Totoro." "Castle in the Sky" is vastly superior to the Disney film inspired by it, "Atlantis."
I'm looking forward to watching a couple more Studio Ghibli films I Tivo's, especially "Pom Poko," about a group of shape-shifting raccoons trying to save their forest home.
Especially encouraging is that the Miyazaki films were introduced by Pixar founder John Lasseter. Miyazaki-san is Lasseter's good friend and mentor. With Lasseter taking over as Chief Creative Director for all of Disney Animation following the Pixar-Disney merger, Disney is due for a renaissance of the highest magnitude. Lasseter could be the new Walt Disney.
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Posted by Wayne to Stone Bridge: Film at 1/30/2006 08:07:00 PM
In all seriousness, I've been really getting into the films of Japanese animation genius Hayao Miyazaki. Turner Classic Movies has been playing his films every Thursday night this week. Savannah and I absolutely fell in love with "Nausicaa of the Valley of the Wind" and "My Neighbor Totoro." "Castle in the Sky" is vastly superior to the Disney film inspired by it, "Atlantis."
I'm looking forward to watching a couple more Studio Ghibli films I Tivo's, especially "Pom Poko," about a group of shape-shifting raccoons trying to save their forest home.
Especially encouraging is that the Miyazaki films were introduced by Pixar founder John Lasseter. Miyazaki-san is Lasseter's good friend and mentor. With Lasseter taking over as Chief Creative Director for all of Disney Animation following the Pixar-Disney merger, Disney is due for a renaissance of the highest magnitude. Lasseter could be the new Walt Disney.
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Posted by Wayne to Stone Bridge: Film at 1/30/2006 08:07:00 PM
[Stone Bridge: Family] And Here We Go Again
After six nights of sleeping at least seven hours straight, Cooper reverted to sleeping 3-4 hours at a time. It's funny how quickly your body adapts. At first, we couldn't sleep more than five hours without waking up. After a couple of nights, we were fully enjoying our sleep. So, when he went back to his short nights, it was very frustrating.
Three nights later, however, Cooper gave us a late Christmas present. He began to sleep not seven, not eight, but nine hours at a time! Cue the angels and bring me a trumpet! It's only been two nights now, but I'll take it.
On the flip side, Savannah has another cold. We've asked her several times if she feels "sinusy." So she has adopted that term and diagnosed herself with a "bad sinusy infection."
A few other recent Savannah gems:
I was aggravating her one day last week, being obfuscatory about something she was asking me. After a couple of attempts to get a serious answer out of me, she turned to her mother with complete exasperation and said, "could you talk to him, please?" Kelli and I were so cracked up by the seriousness of her tone, that we completely forgot what she was asking.
As she was putting on her pajamas (or janamas, in Savvanese) one night, she accidentally put the pants on backward. We pointed this out to her. To her, the solution was simple -- just spin them around. (Her blonde roots run very deep.) We explained to her the error of her idea. Being me, I couldn't leave it alone. I I started to say "if you only had one leg, that might work." All I got out was, "if you only had one leg." Without missing a beat, she finished the sentence, "I'd walk really funny."
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Posted by Wayne to Stone Bridge: Family at 1/30/2006 07:01:00 PM
Three nights later, however, Cooper gave us a late Christmas present. He began to sleep not seven, not eight, but nine hours at a time! Cue the angels and bring me a trumpet! It's only been two nights now, but I'll take it.
On the flip side, Savannah has another cold. We've asked her several times if she feels "sinusy." So she has adopted that term and diagnosed herself with a "bad sinusy infection."
A few other recent Savannah gems:
I was aggravating her one day last week, being obfuscatory about something she was asking me. After a couple of attempts to get a serious answer out of me, she turned to her mother with complete exasperation and said, "could you talk to him, please?" Kelli and I were so cracked up by the seriousness of her tone, that we completely forgot what she was asking.
As she was putting on her pajamas (or janamas, in Savvanese) one night, she accidentally put the pants on backward. We pointed this out to her. To her, the solution was simple -- just spin them around. (Her blonde roots run very deep.) We explained to her the error of her idea. Being me, I couldn't leave it alone. I I started to say "if you only had one leg, that might work." All I got out was, "if you only had one leg." Without missing a beat, she finished the sentence, "I'd walk really funny."
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Posted by Wayne to Stone Bridge: Family at 1/30/2006 07:01:00 PM
Thursday, January 26, 2006
[Stone Bridge: Family] Driving Me to Drink
I joined my dear friend Shea for cheap beers at Wings tonight. Shea's going through a rough divorce after 14 years, so he needed a drink. Me, I'm happily married, I should be able to have a brew for no reason at all. But this week has been different. We're still sleeping through the night -- for the most part -- so that's not a problem. But Savannah has been somewhat of a challenge this week.
At her school they have a color system for behavior. If your kid doesn't make a ny trouble, they stay on green. If they murder the teacher and place her head on a pike to frighten away villagers from neighboring tribes, their color is changed to red. For three days straight, Savvi has been on Yellow. That places her somewhere in the "future leader of a rebellion against the galactic empire, whether evil or no" category.
She maily gets in trouble for laughing and playing during nap time. We let it slide the first day. Inspired by our church, we call that "granting her grace." The second day she got a good talking to and a strategy for preventing trouble. My brilliant close-your-eyes-and-turn-your-back-on-the-instigators plan didn't work at all. Yellow for three days straight.
She was warned that a third day of yellow would reuslt in a spanking and no TV or movies for a week. Given the choice, she had Kelli spank her. She may be a future sociopath, but at least she thinks well on her feet. We reminded her of the no-TV rule and sent her to bed for a nap.
Kelli went up a few minutes later to discover that she had deliberately had an accident in her bed. Self-control and the Holy Spirit prevented Kelli from doing her bodily harm. After that little display, we took away all of her Chronicles of Naria toys (a very serious punishment) and boxed up her DVDs (tantamount to torture.) She'll get the toys and DVDs back in a week, if she stays on green and has no more accidents.
Anyway, all that to say I needed my beer, more than I would have thought a week ago. Plus, it's always good to get more out of shape before starting a documentary about getting in shape. I know, it's a cheap excuse, but I'll keep milking it, thank you.
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Posted by Wayne to Stone Bridge: Family at 1/26/2006 07:17:00 PM
At her school they have a color system for behavior. If your kid doesn't make a ny trouble, they stay on green. If they murder the teacher and place her head on a pike to frighten away villagers from neighboring tribes, their color is changed to red. For three days straight, Savvi has been on Yellow. That places her somewhere in the "future leader of a rebellion against the galactic empire, whether evil or no" category.
She maily gets in trouble for laughing and playing during nap time. We let it slide the first day. Inspired by our church, we call that "granting her grace." The second day she got a good talking to and a strategy for preventing trouble. My brilliant close-your-eyes-and-turn-your-back-on-the-instigators plan didn't work at all. Yellow for three days straight.
She was warned that a third day of yellow would reuslt in a spanking and no TV or movies for a week. Given the choice, she had Kelli spank her. She may be a future sociopath, but at least she thinks well on her feet. We reminded her of the no-TV rule and sent her to bed for a nap.
Kelli went up a few minutes later to discover that she had deliberately had an accident in her bed. Self-control and the Holy Spirit prevented Kelli from doing her bodily harm. After that little display, we took away all of her Chronicles of Naria toys (a very serious punishment) and boxed up her DVDs (tantamount to torture.) She'll get the toys and DVDs back in a week, if she stays on green and has no more accidents.
Anyway, all that to say I needed my beer, more than I would have thought a week ago. Plus, it's always good to get more out of shape before starting a documentary about getting in shape. I know, it's a cheap excuse, but I'll keep milking it, thank you.
--
Posted by Wayne to Stone Bridge: Family at 1/26/2006 07:17:00 PM
[Stone Bridge: Fun] Do Your Part... to Knock the Earth Off its Orbit
Here's a link to the sitge for "World Jump Day" -- an effort to have everyone in the world (or at least a few hundred million people) jump up at the same time to knock the Earth into a wider orbit, thereby lengthening daylight hours and reducing global warming.
Some people have way too much time on their hands. By the way, if you live in the Central Time Zone, we jump at 5:39:13 PM on July 20th.
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Posted by Wayne to Stone Bridge: Fun at 1/26/2006 07:12:00 PM
Some people have way too much time on their hands. By the way, if you live in the Central Time Zone, we jump at 5:39:13 PM on July 20th.
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Posted by Wayne to Stone Bridge: Fun at 1/26/2006 07:12:00 PM
Sunday, January 22, 2006
[Stone Bridge: Family] More Sleep and a Little Laughter
Okay, knock wood, Cooper has slept at least 7 hours straightr for the last three nights. In each case, we've been in bed for 6 of those hours. Unfortunately, our neighbors across the street had a big party for their teenage son following his spring formal. I've never seen this kid have too many friends over, so I got the distinct feeling that his parents were buying his popularity. Maybe I'm wrong. What I know for sure is that waking up at 2:30 in the morning to the sound of squealing teenage girls and testosterone-charged high school boys screaming profanities is not the most pleasant experience in the world. It can only be matched by the time we awoke in a hotel in Germany with German vendorsw screaming at each other in the market below. We thought we were in a WWII movie. Not pleasant.
When we awoke this morning, we noticed that there were still at least a dozen cars outside from the party. If the kids were drinking (which I'm sure they were,) then I'm glad they stayed. I went to parties in high school, but I don't ever remember staying past midnight, and I sure as hell never stayed overnight. I look outside and see not only boys, but also girls leaving the neighbor's house. I have four words for that: No Daughter of Mine!
Savannah asked on the way to church why there were so many cars outside. We explained that the neighbors had a party. "A birthday party?" she asked. "No." "What kind of party?" Kelli and I didn't miss a beat, "the kind of party you're never going to."
Aside from the teenage debauchery, we've been sleeping pretty well for a change. Kelli and I both seem to have aged in reverse over the last week. Now we only look 5-7 years older than we are, rather than 10-15. I'd post pictures to prove how old we were looking, but they're too mortifying.
Starting a little over a week ago, Cooper is laughing for real. He looks for reasons to laugh, sort of goading us on whenever we do something that he thinks is funny. The poor guy gets the hiccups every time he starts to laugh. That doesn't deter him. Just looking at him brings a smile. Unless he's hungry, he's always in a good mood. But he is hungry a lot.
Cooper is eating about every two hours, typically 4-6 ounces. We're really hoping to get permission from his doctor to start feeding him real food. He watches us whenever we eat, longingly staring at each bite. We tried giving him an empty spoon to see if he could handle it. He opened and bit down at the corect times. This kid wants to eat.
He's holding his head up really well. He should be able to sit up, since he is basically a pyramid fromt he waist up. Alas, all that squishy body mass just won't hold him up.
Sorry I haven't been posting much, but we're working on severall speculative projects that might substantially change the way we work, so I've been a little distracted. I'll be setting up a new blog to track my progress in the Body-for-LIFE challenge, including some behind-the-scenes looks at the documentary I'm making about the effort.
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Posted by Wayne to Stone Bridge: Family at 1/22/2006 07:52:00 PM
When we awoke this morning, we noticed that there were still at least a dozen cars outside from the party. If the kids were drinking (which I'm sure they were,) then I'm glad they stayed. I went to parties in high school, but I don't ever remember staying past midnight, and I sure as hell never stayed overnight. I look outside and see not only boys, but also girls leaving the neighbor's house. I have four words for that: No Daughter of Mine!
Savannah asked on the way to church why there were so many cars outside. We explained that the neighbors had a party. "A birthday party?" she asked. "No." "What kind of party?" Kelli and I didn't miss a beat, "the kind of party you're never going to."
Aside from the teenage debauchery, we've been sleeping pretty well for a change. Kelli and I both seem to have aged in reverse over the last week. Now we only look 5-7 years older than we are, rather than 10-15. I'd post pictures to prove how old we were looking, but they're too mortifying.
Starting a little over a week ago, Cooper is laughing for real. He looks for reasons to laugh, sort of goading us on whenever we do something that he thinks is funny. The poor guy gets the hiccups every time he starts to laugh. That doesn't deter him. Just looking at him brings a smile. Unless he's hungry, he's always in a good mood. But he is hungry a lot.
Cooper is eating about every two hours, typically 4-6 ounces. We're really hoping to get permission from his doctor to start feeding him real food. He watches us whenever we eat, longingly staring at each bite. We tried giving him an empty spoon to see if he could handle it. He opened and bit down at the corect times. This kid wants to eat.
He's holding his head up really well. He should be able to sit up, since he is basically a pyramid fromt he waist up. Alas, all that squishy body mass just won't hold him up.
Sorry I haven't been posting much, but we're working on severall speculative projects that might substantially change the way we work, so I've been a little distracted. I'll be setting up a new blog to track my progress in the Body-for-LIFE challenge, including some behind-the-scenes looks at the documentary I'm making about the effort.
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Posted by Wayne to Stone Bridge: Family at 1/22/2006 07:52:00 PM
Wednesday, January 18, 2006
[Stone Bridge: Spam Title Haiku] Vol. 6
This edition of Spam Title Haiku is rife with misspellings and absurdity:
Re: Styx heckle
how we deal with the storms. We can
A eat go troop dink
her ask my scherzo
are common, with an estimated
But type at ti forefather
As dance so overseer
On can to painting slips edgy
it can my stele programer
--
Posted by Wayne to Stone Bridge: Spam Title Haiku at 1/18/2006 12:24:00 PM
Re: Styx heckle
how we deal with the storms. We can
A eat go troop dink
her ask my scherzo
are common, with an estimated
But type at ti forefather
As dance so overseer
On can to painting slips edgy
it can my stele programer
--
Posted by Wayne to Stone Bridge: Spam Title Haiku at 1/18/2006 12:24:00 PM
Tuesday, January 17, 2006
[Stone Bridge: Family] Sleep at Last! Sleep at Last!
Yesterday was a tough one in the Franklin house. Cooper is usually a pretty laid-back kid, but yesterday was a different story. He cried when you put him down. He whined when you picked him up, then he would cry, then he would doze off. We put him down and the whole thing would start over again. Then he would get hungry. We would feed him, but never fast enough for him. As soon as the bottle hit his mouth, he began to push it away. After a half hour or so, we would manage to get a few ounces in him before he dozed off again. Holding of breath, praying, crossing of fingers -- and then he would wake up crying... again.
Finally last night, after switching him back to a milder form of formula, he took about 10 ounces in an hour then fell asleep. And he slept... And he slept... And he slept. He slept for nearly eight hours! Hallelujah!
For those of you who have never lived with a newborn, you can't possibly understand how monumental this moment was for us. I tried to add up the total number of full nights of sleep I have had since last August. I couldn't remember enough of them to come up with a total, but I know the average is around 1-2 nights per month. PER MONTH!
Funny things happen to your body when you don't sleep any more often than that. One of the weirdest is that you forget how to sleep. Last night, though Coop was sleeping soundly, Kelli and I both woke up after about 5 hours and slept restlessly for the rest of the night. Which was only complicated by another symptom of sleep deprivation: the unflinching desire to beat the crap out of somebody -- anybody -- just because you can. So far, we've restrained from physically beating each other.
So when we couldn't sleep due to our own bodies, we did the only reasonable thing we could -- self-flagellation.
Now, we're not talking about a one-man version of The Passion. But if movies have taught us anything, it's that a bunch of oranges wrapped up in a bed sheet, when whacked against your abdomen at a decent velocity, will result in severe pain and internal organ damage. What movies haven't taught us is how to self-administer a citrus belly-whacking on very little sleep. After several failed attempts and converting our bedroom wall into a giant juicer, we took our sticky, juicy, organs-undamaged selves back to bed and decided to be grateful for the sleep we couldn't take advantage of.
I know. I ended that last sentence with a preposition. You want proper grammar? Find a blogger who sleeps all night every night.
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Posted by Wayne to Stone Bridge: Family at 1/17/2006 07:16:00 PM
Finally last night, after switching him back to a milder form of formula, he took about 10 ounces in an hour then fell asleep. And he slept... And he slept... And he slept. He slept for nearly eight hours! Hallelujah!
For those of you who have never lived with a newborn, you can't possibly understand how monumental this moment was for us. I tried to add up the total number of full nights of sleep I have had since last August. I couldn't remember enough of them to come up with a total, but I know the average is around 1-2 nights per month. PER MONTH!
Funny things happen to your body when you don't sleep any more often than that. One of the weirdest is that you forget how to sleep. Last night, though Coop was sleeping soundly, Kelli and I both woke up after about 5 hours and slept restlessly for the rest of the night. Which was only complicated by another symptom of sleep deprivation: the unflinching desire to beat the crap out of somebody -- anybody -- just because you can. So far, we've restrained from physically beating each other.
So when we couldn't sleep due to our own bodies, we did the only reasonable thing we could -- self-flagellation.
Now, we're not talking about a one-man version of The Passion. But if movies have taught us anything, it's that a bunch of oranges wrapped up in a bed sheet, when whacked against your abdomen at a decent velocity, will result in severe pain and internal organ damage. What movies haven't taught us is how to self-administer a citrus belly-whacking on very little sleep. After several failed attempts and converting our bedroom wall into a giant juicer, we took our sticky, juicy, organs-undamaged selves back to bed and decided to be grateful for the sleep we couldn't take advantage of.
I know. I ended that last sentence with a preposition. You want proper grammar? Find a blogger who sleeps all night every night.
--
Posted by Wayne to Stone Bridge: Family at 1/17/2006 07:16:00 PM
Saturday, January 14, 2006
[Stone Bridge: Film] Science Fiction... Science Reality
Sorry for the lack of posts this week, but I've been pretty busy with work stuff. As I've spent long hours in the office, my primary means of maintaining my sanity has been to put on the DVD of my new favorite movie, Serenity. There's a scene in the film where we learn that TVs and video screens not only display information, but also act as security cameras, allowing the government to keep tabs on anyone watching what's on the grid.
I've always been fascinated by the combination of screens and cameras into a single device. Now it seems that Uncle Stevie and the good folks at Apple have patented just such a device.
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Posted by Wayne to Stone Bridge: Film at 1/14/2006 04:03:00 PM
Thursday, January 12, 2006
[Stone Bridge: Fun] I wonder what Bugs Bunny has to say about this...
I ran across a great article today about an old man's conflicting stories about how his house burned down -- by wind-driven embers or by flaming mouse? What I find intriguing is the way he talks:
"That dang mouse crawled in there."
"I have an awful hate for those critters."
I think the real lie is the man's name. Look at the evidence: He catches a mouse and cruelly throws it into a fire -- proof-positive of an irrational hatred toward rodents. He talks like an irascible cowpoke. It's painfully obvious that this man is none other than Yosemite Sam. Sam made his first appearance in 1945, 61 years ago. Mr. "Mares" is now 81. You do the math.
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Posted by Wayne to Stone Bridge: Fun at 1/11/2006 10:07:00 AM
"That dang mouse crawled in there."
"I have an awful hate for those critters."
I think the real lie is the man's name. Look at the evidence: He catches a mouse and cruelly throws it into a fire -- proof-positive of an irrational hatred toward rodents. He talks like an irascible cowpoke. It's painfully obvious that this man is none other than Yosemite Sam. Sam made his first appearance in 1945, 61 years ago. Mr. "Mares" is now 81. You do the math.
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Posted by Wayne to Stone Bridge: Fun at 1/11/2006 10:07:00 AM
Saturday, January 07, 2006
[Stone Bridge: Spam Title Haiku] Vol. 5
This week's entries are rich in simile:
But want as artillery scrimshaw
With wait as humanitarian handout
Or want is tippet disperse
As hurt on gavel
As make do shellacking pasturage
And give as exposure
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Posted by Wayne to Stone Bridge: Spam Title Haiku at 1/07/2006 12:41:00 PM
But want as artillery scrimshaw
With wait as humanitarian handout
Or want is tippet disperse
As hurt on gavel
As make do shellacking pasturage
And give as exposure
--
Posted by Wayne to Stone Bridge: Spam Title Haiku at 1/07/2006 12:41:00 PM
Friday, January 06, 2006
[Stone Bridge: Fotos] Youthifying Treatment
Being the beginning of a new year, everyone seems to be on a self-improvement bent. I, myself, will soon start a new fitness regime -- and hopefully a new documentary to track my efforts. Gym memberships go up. Cookie sales go down.
Kelli and I stumbled upon a topical cream that claims to "reinvigorate as it conditions, leaving your skin with a healthy, youthful glow." They stop short of saying that it will make you actually look younger, but it is definitely implied. We tried the recommended treatment for a couple of days, and we thought we saw a little improvement. Then we decided to throw caution to the wind and really exceeded the recommendations. That may have been a mistake, as you can see in the photos below.
Here are our before photos. (The one of Kelli is a few years old, but is still a good representation of her skin condition before the treatment.)
BEFORE:
Scroll down for the amazing (and somewhat terrifying) results.
AFTER:
I'd type more, but I'm re-learning how to hold my head up, and it's completely exhausting!
--
Posted by Wayne to Stone Bridge: Fotos at 1/06/2006 10:39:00 AM
Kelli and I stumbled upon a topical cream that claims to "reinvigorate as it conditions, leaving your skin with a healthy, youthful glow." They stop short of saying that it will make you actually look younger, but it is definitely implied. We tried the recommended treatment for a couple of days, and we thought we saw a little improvement. Then we decided to throw caution to the wind and really exceeded the recommendations. That may have been a mistake, as you can see in the photos below.
Here are our before photos. (The one of Kelli is a few years old, but is still a good representation of her skin condition before the treatment.)
BEFORE:
Scroll down for the amazing (and somewhat terrifying) results.
AFTER:
I'd type more, but I'm re-learning how to hold my head up, and it's completely exhausting!
--
Posted by Wayne to Stone Bridge: Fotos at 1/06/2006 10:39:00 AM
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